Cold Spaghetti

I took these pictures at the start of the month to document the kids’ head-wounds. Kate was pushed down and run over by big kids at the park while I photographed Valerie & family (Paul was there and ran the appropriate parenting past said kids):
And this is Will, about a week post-op from his short attempt at flight. Neither one got it in the center of their foreheads, so I can only think that they are trying for a Drew Bree’s look?

I am officially a Candidate for the Doctorate of Philosophy in Public Health.

And hot damn and hallelujah for that. I don’t ever have to go through it again! (The candidacy part, that is.)

It wasn’t that bad, the ‘deliberation’ took maybe a minute (one of the shortest I’ve seen) and the only revision I have to make is to construct the full field guide (usually done collaboratively, but they want me to produce my own full copy before hiring anyone). With some of the questions and discussion that occurred, I was pretty surprised that I wouldn’t be doing more. The discussion was extremely supportive and most of the talk was literally about what choices would make things easier on me — which, in retrospect, was really wise. My committee had a lot of different views and comments and them all hashing over my prospectus was a great lesson in why diverse teams can be strong: it is great to have many viewpoints.

So, my “prospectus results” form was completed with the “approved” box checked. Once I do the changes they want, I turn in the full prospectus to the Dean. Then, I actually have to start doing all the things my committee agreed I was qualified to do. Honestly, it’s hard to celebrate this milestone mostly because the work isn’t over… it’s sort of like it’s just started. The celebration part is that I don’t have to pass any more qualifying milestones… I just have to complete the research I proposed.

But that can happen later. Right now, I want to focus on some holiday fun — and maybe treat myself to a massage or something tomorrow…?

At risk of sounding uncharacteristically sappy, I want it documented that my husband is the real hero behind all of this degree stuff. The reasons are too numerous to count, but include things like… coming to my practice defense on Tuesday; letting me sleep in this morning while he got the kids fed; going out to buy the goodies for my committee (presenters tends to bring snacks and beverages to defenses); driving me to my defense because it was pouring rain (and I was in my fancy clothes, with a ton of stuff to carry — all of which would have been destroyed in the walk from parking to building); cleaning the house and doing a load of laundry while I defended; thinking about dinner… then agreeing to a last minute babysitter to take me out to a Very Nice dinner instead (and yes, JoAnn came by and said congratulations).

This is all while working so hard to plan for our renovations, which Paul has been single-handedly completing with the kind of skill and detail that most professionals would envy. Did I mention that last weekend, while I took the kids to Mobile for Will to attend the Holiday concert with my parents, Paul *JACKED UP THE HOUSE,* repaired several old termite-eaten feet, and took off (and replaced) the entire back of our house? And he did all of it alone? Not to mention all of the reading, asking questions, and legwork for lumber. So far, we are incredibly under-budget. Some of that is a group effort on finding windows and doors (more on that… I keep thinking Paul is going to write about it) but really, the bottom line is because of Paul. He is really working so hard on making this renovation spectacular, pouring every bit of love and detail into it as he gives to us… which (trust me) is boundless. Thank you, Pancho!

A surprise email came in this morning from Nairobi. Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles! Committee member number 4 is back to Nairobi from far west Kenya, got my last draft (sent last night), says it looks great, has no concerns or comments, and will be available this afternoon for the defense! (Although it will be 11pm her time; she’s 9 hours ahead.) Yesterday, we thought we were just going to go with the requisite 3 members and press on. So today will be a great test of Kenyan mobile phone service (very pertinent since this is a main research interest of said committee member). I cannot believe that this is working out.

One issue remains.

I realized that the one Very Important Detail I had completely looked over was my outfit. I’m a bit of a clothes horse (what can I say? I’ve got a theatre background… it’s all about the costume). Having forgotten about the outfit was a new one for me. Maybe it wasn’t so much forgetting as not having time to think about it.

Once upon a time, in a world without children, I possessed a fabulous wardrobe comprised of gorgeous hand-me downs from my Mother’s exquisite professional collection (my Mom is the Queen of classy dressing) and beautiful suits that said Mommy bought for me to use for the various wedding-related things that happened the summer Paul and I got married (thanks, Mom!) I used these outfits for Every Single Special Event I attended over several years… until I got pregnant. I finally gave up the ghost this summer (let’s face it, I’ll never be able to button a size 8 blouse again) and donated or consigned the bulk of my professional collection (worn when I worked for the Government). I kept those wedding-summer outfits because they are just too good to part with. Maybe Kate will wear them someday. (Don’t laugh: a major portion of that professional collection were clothes that my Mom saved from when I was as young as Kate is now. And those who know me from high school know that I wore outfits from my Mom’s high school days — straight outta Grandma Betty’s closet — all the time.)

But today, in the here and now, I am woefully lacking in the wardrobe apartment. I’ve been a grad student or working in contexts where fancy dress is not appropriate for so long that I have nothing respectable to call on.

For the Bat Mitzvah last October, I bought a pair of dress shoes (the only ones I own… bright red patent leather flats that are awesome*), a beautiful pair of part-silk brown pants from Talbots (hugely on sale) and a fancy orange v-neck sweater (also on sale). I dressed it up with a scarf I bought years ago in India and pulled it all together to be just fancy enough for the party. The one issue… I didn’t have time to go to the Bead Store and make jewelry to accent the ensemble.

It isn’t the best outfit for a defense, but this morning I thought I could wear it, if I could finish the jewelry. I made a necklace weeks ago (the nicest one I’ve made yet) with wooden beads of different shapes and colors. But I wasn’t sure about doing the crimps on the ends and didn’t think I had the right materials to finish it off. My intent was to visit Georgia on the way downtown to finish it. But this morning, I had to play with it… so I took it out, decided to add a little length, took off the tape securing the edge… and dropped it. Beads went everywhere. No more necklace. *sigh*

What else do I have? I’m not even sure. The brown pants are the only nice pants I have. I do have a white blouse (really cool, ties in the center) also from that Talbots sale. But it needs ironing (it’s washable, but requires ironing afterward). This is a problem as we do not own an iron or an ironing board. Maybe I can go to a neighbor’s and iron it there? But will it even work with the pants? (It would be best with a more fitted black pant.)

Oh, and then, there is the issue of my hair. Which has not been cut, highlighted, styled, or otherwise by anyone qualified in almost 9 months. Do I even own makeup? I’m fairly certain that there is no lipstick of any variety within my entire house. I did give myself a little manicure last week, so at least my nails aren’t offensive. In my defense, I at least was thinking about my hair… I asked Paul a few weeks back if I should cut it, or color it (I’ve done highlights about once a year for about 10 years), or something different? I think he’s exact words were “hair? what hair? you’ve got hair?”

Bright side: I’m no longer worried about the defense. I’m worried that I’ll look like myself: a woman who has not spent an ounce of time or effort on her appearance in over 7 years.

*I have not tried on the shoes since I broke the foot. I still cannot wear the majority of my shoes and am terrified of the reality that these will kill my right foot. My back-up plan is to wear a slipper or something to the room and then just ignore the binding pain for the defense. I just have to stand in one place, so it shouldn’t be too bad…

Crazy girl and her awesome hat. Courtesy of Emmy and her amazing find. My kids in hats: something that always makes me smile.

It’s midnight. I’m fighting off a cold. Kate has a terrible rash covering her legs and is having trouble sleeping.

Tomorrow, I’m defending the work I’ve been doing for 2 or so years to reach PhD candidacy. Tomorrow is a big friggin’ day.

And Paul is on his way next door, to ask our neighbor to turn down the microphone and amp’ed sound (despite some work by a sound technician to sound-proof the house; it’s not over or it’s a damn awful job) so that we can get some sleep.

“Will, what are you going to ask Santa to bring you for Christmas?”

“A Robot.”

My kid has his heart set on some “robot” that I worry he’s invented (“it talks and changes into a car”). Anyone know of a robot like that?

…is out to committee.

Practice defense (with requisite invitation having been sent to all doctoral students) is tomorrow morning. The actual formal defense to the full committee is Thursday.

I cannot wait for this to be done and am on pins and needles. I don’t know how I am going sleep over the next few days.

One more important question remains (maybe the most important): Where is the party Thursday/Friday night???

“Goodnight, Will. I love you.”

“I love you. Mommy? Will you ask Daddy to come in and cuddle with me?”

“Daddy’s working. How ’bout I cuddle with you?”

“No. I need Daddy. You can go work.”

“Why do you need Daddy?”

” ‘cuz Daddy’s a boy and we’re faster than girls.”

A gorgeous, huge, vibrant, rainbow hung over our neighborhood yesterday afternoon. I got a few pictures of it as it started to fade… cascading over our house.

That’s Paul and the kids walking up to our porch. Will is wearing Kate’s floppy yellow hat, which he wore all day yesterday. He’s become very fond of that hat.

Meanwhile, out in the back…

Paul is continuing to amaze us in his endless knowledge and abilities. And despite the craziness with ordering materials, calls to my Dad to discuss building strategies, and a huge range of coordination madness…. I think he is really enjoying it. Or maybe it’s being out in the perfect weather. Either way, he has kept up progress and took down the old cypress boards to find the original lathe board and a peak into some of the structural pieces of the house. He has started blogging again, so check there for more pictures and updates on the gory details.