{"id":5592,"date":"2009-12-09T18:50:41","date_gmt":"2009-12-10T01:50:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/?p=5592"},"modified":"2009-12-16T22:59:01","modified_gmt":"2009-12-17T05:59:01","slug":"how-to-decorate-a-christmas-tree-cold-spaghetti-edition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/2009\/12\/09\/how-to-decorate-a-christmas-tree-cold-spaghetti-edition\/","title":{"rendered":"How to decorate a Christmas Tree, Cold Spaghetti Edition"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>1. Turn on the lights when putting the tree together.\u00c2\u00a0 In this situation, keeping your mouth shut and the lights off for the purposes of martial accord is not a good choice.<\/p>\n<p>2. When dark sections of the pre-lit tree are found, do not bother spending anytime trying to find out why.  Certainly do not spend several hours over an entire day doing so.<\/p>\n<p>3. Do not check every bulb.  Even if you are so clever as to take white paper to hold in back of the bulb in order to properly see the filament.<\/p>\n<p>4. Do not change every fuse twice.  It won&#8217;t make any difference.<\/p>\n<p>5. Do not make fingers bloody by taking out and replacing bulbs.  It won&#8217;t make any difference.<\/p>\n<p>6. Buy a few strands of lights and add them on the tree, filling in the dark areas&#8230;. BUT FIRST&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>7. Test each part of the ENTIRE tree. It&#8217;s really a bummer to &#8216;fix&#8217; the dark spots at the bottom and then put on the top to find another dark spot.  I mean, it really, really sucks.<\/p>\n<p>8. When you get those string lights?  Make sure they are the same color as the rest of the tree.<\/p>\n<p>9. Do not involve the kids until your tree is completely set up, light, and has appropriate tinsel or garland.  Otherwise, be prepared for excited children equating to ornament disasters.<\/p>\n<p>10. Also, excited children in the same room as ladders, chairs, stools, or other climbing apparatus are ways of begging for a trip to the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/2007\/11\/26\/superman-flies-and-lands-15-minutes-before-bedtime\/\">emergency room<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>1. Turn on the lights when putting the tree together.\u00c2\u00a0 In this situation, keeping your mouth shut and the lights off for the purposes of martial accord is not a good choice. 2. When dark sections of the pre-lit tree are found, do not bother spending anytime trying to find out why. Certainly do not [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[67],"tags":[177],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5592"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5592"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5592\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5594,"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5592\/revisions\/5594"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5592"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5592"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coldspaghetti.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5592"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}